Posted by Anthony CarboneDecember 6, 2016 at 12:54 am
Watch the funniest and most ridiculous music video I’ve ever seen – BIG NEM’s “Tickle My Dick”
In July my friend told me about “Big Nem”. I was confused by the name and asked who the hell he was. He told me he was a friend of his who is going to be a big name one day. Apparently he was about 7 feet tall, a rapper, comedian, and filmmaker. I confusingly laughed at all those details and wondered what planet this person was from.
He told me Nem was shooting a music video and he couldn’t make it to the shoot and asked me to fill in for him to observe and meet him for potential collaborations. I texted Nem and he told me where and when it was.
It was a really hot day in an abandoned lot. When I got there I saw beautiful, voluptuous girls in body paint, nibbling on baby carrots in a makeshift tent as they Snapchatted their Raptors jersey-style body art. I immediately thought, “if only my girlfriend knew where I was”.
That’s when he emerged from a nearby alley with a crew of 10 around him, along with a super sexy girl in a latex suit, and two oiled up male bodybuilders who were led by her on dog leashes. She positioned herself with the bodybuilders beside her in front an orange Lamborghini Gallardo. He yelled graciously, “Ok gentlemen, we need more humping on each side of her hips, Kevin I need you to squat up and down her side while sniffing her legs like a creep… Ok? Action!”. The girl began rapping “Tickle yo dick? I ain’t tickling’ shit… I’m Jewish bitch, my daddy own all yo property”. Nem yelled, “Cut! That was great, but I need more hip thrusting from you guys! Knock her back and forth please!”
I couldn’t help but die laughing. He kind of reminded me of Ivan Drago from Rocky but his sensibility as a director was more of a Judd Apatow or Seth Rogen; calm, intelligent but very silly. We spoke at the break and he told me the song was called “Tickle My Dick”, a “trap” song about how girls tease guys in nightclubs. It was not only his song he was performing, but he was the producer and director of the music video. There were about 30 people on set and I was very impressed by the production, I asked him how much the production cost. He said “I pulled it out of my ass for $800”. I didn’t believe him. He told me he had a big network and support group of high level professionals that believed in his ideas. I was beginning to understand why.
That’s when he was up to perform, “Ok ladies, I need one of you to shake it in the Lambo strictly for satirical purposes. Who’s up for it?” One girl was excited to take the role and easily hopped in. But that’s when it happened. He couldn’t fit. He was way too tall! It was quite a sight and sound. His one leg got stuck and he started screaming in a near perfect Arnold Schwarzenegger voice across the field. He struggled for a bit, getting in and out and closely examining the seat and base of the vehicle. It was his first time in one of these. He yelled, “Aaaauuurrrggghh. I can’t fit into ze Lambo, call Shaquille O’Neal! I need something custom-made! Aaauuurghh”. He eventually barely squeezed in with his knees sticking out as if it were a toddler’s toy car When he yelled action, and it was really amusing to see how strong of a performer he was.
After the shoot, I spoke to him and his girlfriend (who was on set all day, helping and supporting him, despite having attractive women dancing all over him). I told him I was really impressed and have not laughed that hard in a very long time. He told me that he has been building content for over a year and this is the very first thing he’ll be releasing to the public. We spoke about the premise. He said it came from “real-life experience”. Working as a bouncer after his basketball career didn’t go according to plan, he would observe people and their behaviours in the clubs, especially for comedic material.
He told me how girls would come by and grab or “tickle” his and other guys’ dicks and when they would ask to speak with them, the girls almost always kept walking and laughing. Nem realized that the reason they did that was for their own benefit of seeking attention. I was impressed that there was something more to this than just ridiculous comedy. He responded, “Well I would consider myself a self-taught psychologist from this bouncing thing.” Lol.
We spoke about his other projects, a major documentary about his 40 year-old virgin friend who still has a curfew (which is being produced by a major studio in a couple years), a sketch comedy show he will be pitching to networks next year called “#NEMSWORLD”, and his exciting new comedic hip hop album. He said what he’s doing with his work is satirizing pop culture and modern day young people’s culture while using those same mediums. He then quirkily noted, “I’ll need your help with some nice cars to capture peoples’ attention, but please… no Lambos.” I chuckled and offered him my McLaren, to which he said “Alright, FINE.”… I hope he can fit in it!
When I saw the final cut of the video last week, I laughed ten times harder than when I was on set. I immediately knew it had the “it factor” and therefore I wanted to share this experience with you and offer a behind the scenes glimpse of Nem’s Word. Now we’re just pushing and promoting it. It’s a little racy, but if you understand it, it will give you a good laugh. His upcoming videos we’re working on are less controversial so stay tuned for those and if you like the video share it with your friends!
You can watch BIG NEM’s debut music video “Tickle My D*ck” on Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R9WcKa5s3q8
Subscribe to his channel and follow him as well for upcoming hilarious videos:
YouTube: Nems World